Finding Freedom | Better Together | TBN

Finding Freedom | Better Together

Watch Finding Freedom | Better Together
January 13, 2020
25:53

Are you dealing with painful memories and triggers from the past? Will you allow God to heal the most hidden parts of your heart? | TBN Prayer Line: 1-888-731-1000

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Finding Freedom | Better Together

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  • - Mending our wounded minds and hearts.
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  • If a painful memory is holding you back
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  • today's conversation is for you.
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  • Through inner healing, let's reach freedom together.
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  • (upbeat music)
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  • - I think one of the moments that surprised me the most,
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  • when it comes to inner healing
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  • or looking back over my life in reflection,
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  • I can recall, I think it was after I got married
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  • and it was after having four children
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  • and it was the moment of recovery after the twins
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  • because I had four girls under the age of two
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  • and it was the last pregnancy, third pregnancy,
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  • and the bonding with my kids got a little more challenging.
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  • And when it came to intimacy with my husband,
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  • I started to become a little more erratic,
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  • like my body would shut down in the most intimate moments
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  • and at the same time, you feel like
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  • you're having an out of body experience,
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  • viewing yourself from the outside,
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  • almost like a third party.
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  • And you see your body begin to just close up,
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  • begin to distance itself
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  • and I was not aware that my body
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  • was automatically just protecting itself constantly,
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  • without my permission.
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  • And that was the moment, in self reflection,
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  • that I can see that something was manifesting in my life
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  • that I had no control over.
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  • My body was responding without my permission,
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  • without my engagement, and I became so self-aware,
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  • that it would take some time
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  • to try to bring myself back.
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  • Weeks and spells of two weeks that I'm good,
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  • two weeks that I'm really poor in my physical health,
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  • in my mental health,
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  • the self-narrative that I would speak to myself
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  • and I came to a point where it was almost like
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  • the climax of the point of where I realized,
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  • there's something wrong with me
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  • and I need to fix it really fast,
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  • or else my marriage won't last.
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  • I can remember just digging out of the pit
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  • of wholeness, healing, what does that look like,
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  • I couldn't afford counseling, couldn't afford medication,
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  • especially being young in marriage,
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  • you're building your life, you're working,
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  • being in ministry, having four children.
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  • Those are the shades of what it looks like
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  • to feel very disabled on the inside.
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  • So, what is healing to me?
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  • Healing means, like James chapter one, it says that
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  • consider it all joy when you go through various trials
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  • and tribulations because if you allow perseverance,
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  • and perseverance has its perfect work,
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  • you will be complete and lacking nothing.
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  • I felt very incomplete.
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  • I felt very ill-equipped.
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  • I felt very half-full instead of the fullness of God.
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  • And so, that's the beginning of the journey
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  • of my healing, of what healing looks like.
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  • It's the completeness.
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  • - Were you able to trace where that began?
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  • What the root of that was?
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  • - It was abuse.
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  • I was abused by the age of three,
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  • all the way to the age of 12.
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  • And this was by my stepdad and his son,
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  • which is my stepbrother and also a family friend,
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  • which was almost like a godparent, so to speak.
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  • So, three individuals that targeted my life
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  • and I think the manifestation of all of that,
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  • just the coping mechanisms
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  • that I worked through all my life,
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  • that had helped me during the time where I was being abused,
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  • my body would protect itself, would just shut down,
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  • wall up, lock it up, whatever, to survive.
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  • And so, looking back at it now,
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  • you begin to see, okay, I needed help,
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  • I needed wholeness, I need healing
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  • and that I did receive,
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  • as soon as I started to engage in that
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  • and press through that.
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  • - How many women have that story in the world today?
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  • People are broken.
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  • People are emotionally wrecked inside
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  • and so, this week, we're gonna talk about
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  • how God wants to heal those broken places
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  • down deep in our souls.
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  • So, what'd you do?
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  • What'd you do first?
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  • - The first step was acknowledgement
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  • that something was wrong because it was a trigger
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  • and if you're not familiar with your own life
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  • and not self-aware, you'll just go through life
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  • with all these triggers
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  • and you'll just react to life instead of engaging in life.
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  • So, I was reacting and I didn't realize,
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  • in the beginning of the marriage it was awesome
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  • but all of a sudden, as soon as I had children,
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  • it touched on a vulnerability that okay,
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  • there's something wrong with me,
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  • why am I not affectionate?
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  • Why am--
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  • - What are those triggers for you?
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  • - The triggers were the children.
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  • It's like facing myself, you know.
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  • - Really?
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  • - Facing myself, almost like a mirror of the innocence
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  • and I was robbed. - As a younger woman.
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  • - I was robbed of that innocence.
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  • Emotionally, I remember going to the doctor
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  • and he prescribed something for me.
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  • I took it and I felt an intense burning in my chest.
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  • It was not working and so I realized,
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  • okay, this is gonna be a long road.
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  • A pill can't fix it for some reason for me.
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  • So, I remember the first instinct
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  • that I received from the Holy Spirit
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  • was just go outdoors, Diana.
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  • Just go outdoors.
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  • Don't stay indoors, go outdoors.
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  • So I started going outdoors with all of my four kids
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  • and a triple stroller, one on a leash,
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  • and I'm like, okay, I'm just trying to survive.
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  • So, I'm pushing the stroller,
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  • trying to be outside, getting Vitamin D,
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  • because I was susceptible for low moments in my life.
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  • So, I needed that.
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  • I needed a friend.
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  • I remember in college, one of the choir members
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  • just happened to work in the counseling center on campus
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  • and she said, "Oh, you know, whenever you want to chat,
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  • "just come over and chat."
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  • And I distinctly remember
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  • sharing the story with her of my life
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  • and it was almost like sequence order.
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  • And for many abuse survivors,
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  • they need to share their story.
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  • It's like, chronologically, a time pattern in sequence,
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  • and the more you tell it, the more it sets you free.
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  • And so, that was the beginning of just, the journey.
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  • - I was interested when Diana said
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  • that the more you tell your story,
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  • the more it sets you free,
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  • and I think there's so much truth in that
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  • because sometimes we hold our story in, you know,
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  • and it's attached to shame and we think we're the only one.
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  • I remember the first time I spoke out loud
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  • about the fact that I'm diagnosed with clinical depression
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  • and I mean, I remember thinking
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  • I was waiting for a lightning bolt
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  • or for the audience to clear out.
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  • What was so interesting to me
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  • was at the end of that particular conference,
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  • I stood in line for maybe an hour, an hour and a half,
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  • listening to women tell me their stories,
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  • saying things like I've never heard anyone
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  • tell my story out loud.
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  • When you're healed enough to be able to tell your story,
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  • it's where you begin to see the redemption of Christ.
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  • Like at the end of the story of Joseph,
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  • what you intended for evil, God intended for good.
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  • I recommend that when wounds are fresh,
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  • then we don't just share our story,
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  • we need time to find a level of healing,
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  • but then, when we're in a place
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  • where we're able to share our story,
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  • not only does it set us free,
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  • but we have the joy of seeing God use it
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  • to set other people free, too.
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  • - There's power in words.
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  • There's power in, Proverbs, I think it says,
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  • a joyful spirit, a right mind,
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  • that when you have a healthy mind
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  • and a healthy attitude, oh there's healing,
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  • but woe to the person who has a broken spirit
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  • because it's like disease in the bones.
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  • - You know what, it's funny
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  • because you mentioned taking medication
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  • and I've long believed that you can't heal
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  • spiritual brokenness with physical--
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  • - Oh, talk about it.
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  • - Right, I mean like,
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  • our spirit is so different than our body
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  • and we try to medicate the body
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  • and it doesn't penetrate the spirit.
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  • I mean, and I get that, where you have people
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  • who are dealing with trauma
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  • and you're dealing with pain
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  • and you're like, well, if I could just sleep longer,
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  • if I could just take this pill,
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  • if I can just take this vacation
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  • and you end up doing all those things
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  • and it doesn't heal
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  • and it's really discovering what you said,
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  • which is that spiritual healing power
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  • that comes in Christ and it comes in the word of God.
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  • - And I think shining the light in there.
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  • - Absolutely.
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  • - And that's what Jesus does for us.
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  • I remember as a kid, we had to go pull the weeds outside.
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  • My Daddy would send us out to go pull
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  • and we had tumbleweeds in Arizona
  • 00:09:53.030 --> 00:09:55.190
  • and I remember Daddy would have to say,
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  • "You've gotta get it down by the root
  • 00:09:57.090 --> 00:09:59.180
  • "and you gotta pull the root out
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  • "or it's just gonna keep growing."
  • 00:10:01.220 --> 00:10:03.270
  • So, I did that many times.
  • 00:10:03.270 --> 00:10:07.000
  • I have pulled a million weeds. (laughs)
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  • But you have to pull by the root
  • 00:10:09.140 --> 00:10:11.070
  • and I think that's what we have to do in our own lives
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  • when there's something that
  • 00:10:16.020 --> 00:10:17.210
  • your mind is continually going back to
  • 00:10:17.210 --> 00:10:21.040
  • or you're stuck in a time of a tragedy
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  • or emotional or abuse or whatever you've gone through,
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  • Jesus wants to shine a light there
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  • and he wants to pull that out by the root
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  • because he wants to fill every broken piece in our life.
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  • I love where he says, "I stand at the door and I knock,"
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  • but we have to let him into those places.
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  • We have to say, "Come on in, Jesus.
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  • "Come in and shine your light here."
  • 00:10:48.270 --> 00:10:50.200
  • - Whether you're sharing your testimony,
  • 00:10:53.090 --> 00:10:55.080
  • - Or a prayer request,
  • 00:10:55.080 --> 00:10:56.220
  • - Stay connected with us on social media @bettertogethertv.
  • 00:10:56.220 --> 00:11:00.090
  • - Join the conversation.
  • 00:11:00.090 --> 00:11:01.230
  • - We can't wait to hear from you.
  • 00:11:01.230 --> 00:11:04.010
  • (uplifting music)
  • 00:11:04.010 --> 00:11:06.130
  • - Sometimes it can be trauma from a sexual abuse
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  • but I discovered something about myself last year.
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  • I mean, I'm 63 years old and--
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  • - But you look great.
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  • - I was like, you look you're 36.
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  • (talking over each other)
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  • (laughs)
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  • - You do. - Yes, yes, continue.
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  • - One of the things, I thought why is it that every time,
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  • my husband doesn't like to drive so I mostly drive
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  • but every now and again, we go back from a trip
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  • and I'm tired or he picks me up from an international trip
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  • and he's a good driver, I am terrified.
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  • And I've been asking the Holy Spirit what's it about
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  • and it goes back to, because I began to pray,
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  • when I was five, my father tried to kill me.
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  • So, I had this - Wow.
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  • - Sense that at some point in my life,
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  • the person who I trust the most
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  • and who I love the most, is gonna kill me.
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  • And when I talked to my husband about it
  • 00:11:57.080 --> 00:11:59.220
  • and it was like, he totally understood it then
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  • and it was trying to bring that before the Lord,
  • 00:12:02.080 --> 00:12:04.100
  • because a, my husband is a good man
  • 00:12:04.100 --> 00:12:06.290
  • and b, he's a good driver
  • 00:12:06.290 --> 00:12:08.090
  • and c, he loves me,
  • 00:12:08.090 --> 00:12:09.200
  • but it was this primal root of thinking
  • 00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:12.060
  • the person who's closest to you--
  • 00:12:12.060 --> 00:12:14.010
  • - Who's supposed to be protecting you.
  • 00:12:14.010 --> 00:12:15.270
  • - Who's the one who's supposed to protect you,
  • 00:12:15.270 --> 00:12:17.040
  • will be the one who takes you out.
  • 00:12:17.040 --> 00:12:18.210
  • So I have to, daily, I mean,
  • 00:12:18.210 --> 00:12:20.260
  • I still have to bring that before the Lord
  • 00:12:20.260 --> 00:12:22.270
  • and it's like, 'cause I think,
  • 00:12:22.270 --> 00:12:24.080
  • sometimes we think inner healing
  • 00:12:24.080 --> 00:12:26.100
  • is like a one (snaps fingers)
  • 00:12:26.100 --> 00:12:28.030
  • but it's not, it's like you said, it's a process.
  • 00:12:28.030 --> 00:12:29.130
  • (uplifting music)
  • 00:12:29.130 --> 00:12:30.110
  • - Inner healing is so important
  • 00:12:30.110 --> 00:12:31.290
  • because we're actually tri-part beings.
  • 00:12:31.290 --> 00:12:36.070
  • We are a body, but we're also a soul and we have a spirit.
  • 00:12:36.070 --> 00:12:41.070
  • At the intersection of our spirit and our body, is our soul
  • 00:12:42.190 --> 00:12:44.140
  • and that's where our mind, our will, and our emotions lives.
  • 00:12:44.140 --> 00:12:47.140
  • And I think that the challenge for many of us
  • 00:12:47.140 --> 00:12:50.000
  • is we believe that as long as we can act
  • 00:12:50.000 --> 00:12:53.190
  • like everything is okay, that everything is okay,
  • 00:12:53.190 --> 00:12:56.240
  • but trauma, in many ways, is like fingerprints on a glass.
  • 00:12:56.240 --> 00:13:01.260
  • The fingerprints will stay there until they're wiped off.
  • 00:13:03.080 --> 00:13:05.220
  • So, it doesn't matter if the glass sits there
  • 00:13:05.220 --> 00:13:08.000
  • for five years, 10 years, 20 years,
  • 00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:10.000
  • the fingerprints will stay there.
  • 00:13:10.000 --> 00:13:12.010
  • It's the same with trauma.
  • 00:13:12.010 --> 00:13:13.150
  • I think inner healing is so important
  • 00:13:13.150 --> 00:13:15.040
  • because inner healing is what wipes away
  • 00:13:15.040 --> 00:13:17.180
  • those smudges from the glass.
  • 00:13:17.180 --> 00:13:19.120
  • It gives us an opportunity
  • 00:13:19.120 --> 00:13:21.020
  • to start afresh with a new understanding of who we are.
  • 00:13:21.020 --> 00:13:23.290
  • - To me, it's like Romans 12:1,
  • 00:13:24.180 --> 00:13:26.200
  • that we become living sacrifices.
  • 00:13:26.200 --> 00:13:28.280
  • And a living sacrifice can choose to crawl off the altar.
  • 00:13:28.280 --> 00:13:32.190
  • In the Old Testament, sacrifices, they were done.
  • 00:13:32.190 --> 00:13:34.250
  • (laughs)
  • 00:13:34.250 --> 00:13:36.100
  • - It's a once in a moment--
  • 00:13:36.100 --> 00:13:37.250
  • (talking over each other)
  • 00:13:37.250 --> 00:13:39.060
  • - Not the same thing anymore.
  • 00:13:39.060 --> 00:13:40.130
  • - Choose daily to remain on that altar
  • 00:13:40.130 --> 00:13:41.170
  • and offer up our brokenness to the Lord.
  • 00:13:41.170 --> 00:13:43.210
  • - I think about, I've been very blessed in my career
  • 00:13:45.180 --> 00:13:48.250
  • and I mean, the Lord, for whatever reason,
  • 00:13:48.250 --> 00:13:51.060
  • just favored me at a very young age,
  • 00:13:51.060 --> 00:13:53.220
  • and even though I achieved a lot,
  • 00:13:53.220 --> 00:13:56.200
  • I felt like I was running from something.
  • 00:13:56.200 --> 00:14:00.130
  • And I would never forget, I used to be in politics,
  • 00:14:00.130 --> 00:14:04.060
  • and I had left a reception at the White House
  • 00:14:04.060 --> 00:14:06.080
  • and the president was there
  • 00:14:06.080 --> 00:14:07.090
  • and I'm looking around the room
  • 00:14:07.090 --> 00:14:08.150
  • at all these people who are amazing
  • 00:14:08.150 --> 00:14:09.220
  • and I literally was like, "Why am I here?"
  • 00:14:09.220 --> 00:14:12.280
  • And I left there feeling so empty.
  • 00:14:12.280 --> 00:14:15.140
  • And of course, you know, you post on social media
  • 00:14:15.140 --> 00:14:17.020
  • and people are like oh wow look at what--
  • 00:14:17.020 --> 00:14:18.220
  • - Post all the good stuff, that's amazing.
  • 00:14:18.220 --> 00:14:19.290
  • - And I felt so empty and I prayed
  • 00:14:19.290 --> 00:14:21.090
  • and I was like, Lord, why is it
  • 00:14:21.090 --> 00:14:23.140
  • that I have all these trappings of success
  • 00:14:23.140 --> 00:14:25.180
  • and yet I feel trapped in the success.
  • 00:14:25.180 --> 00:14:28.140
  • And I think it took me back to growing up,
  • 00:14:28.140 --> 00:14:31.250
  • my mom, she was physically abusive, verbally abusive,
  • 00:14:31.250 --> 00:14:35.050
  • I dealt with sexual abuse from her boyfriend.
  • 00:14:35.050 --> 00:14:38.110
  • I mean, she literally took me with her
  • 00:14:38.110 --> 00:14:40.180
  • to pick him up from jail
  • 00:14:40.180 --> 00:14:41.290
  • when she had him locked up for abusing me.
  • 00:14:41.290 --> 00:14:43.220
  • So it was just, I remember feeling like, you know what,
  • 00:14:43.220 --> 00:14:48.130
  • I'm literally using my success to run from my past.
  • 00:14:48.130 --> 00:14:53.120
  • I'm using these positions and these titles
  • 00:14:53.120 --> 00:14:55.260
  • to try to feel like I matter
  • 00:14:55.260 --> 00:14:57.140
  • because to the person who I should have mattered the most to
  • 00:14:57.140 --> 00:15:00.200
  • I didn't.
  • 00:15:00.200 --> 00:15:01.250
  • And I think--
  • 00:15:01.250 --> 00:15:03.030
  • - The fact that you acknowledged it
  • 00:15:03.030 --> 00:15:04.090
  • and you were willing to face up to it
  • 00:15:04.090 --> 00:15:06.000
  • and view the most painful, broken part of you,
  • 00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:09.210
  • where it kinda started from, that's the first step.
  • 00:15:09.210 --> 00:15:12.070
  • - But, it took years because I mean,
  • 00:15:12.070 --> 00:15:13.290
  • I didn't even want to believe that.
  • 00:15:13.290 --> 00:15:16.130
  • I didn't want to believe that I wanted the bigger titles
  • 00:15:16.130 --> 00:15:19.180
  • and all these things because it was masking something.
  • 00:15:19.180 --> 00:15:21.200
  • I didn't want to believe that about myself
  • 00:15:21.200 --> 00:15:23.100
  • but I had to get to that place where I recognized that
  • 00:15:23.100 --> 00:15:26.000
  • because, to your point, Laurie,
  • 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:27.170
  • I think our biggest issue is shame.
  • 00:15:27.170 --> 00:15:30.010
  • - Oh, for sure.
  • 00:15:30.010 --> 00:15:31.110
  • - Shame is not about what we did,
  • 00:15:31.110 --> 00:15:33.200
  • it's not about what happened to us,
  • 00:15:33.200 --> 00:15:35.030
  • it's about what we believe about ourselves
  • 00:15:35.030 --> 00:15:36.290
  • because of what happened.
  • 00:15:36.290 --> 00:15:38.070
  • And so I had all this stuff but I felt empty
  • 00:15:38.070 --> 00:15:42.240
  • until I really understood
  • 00:15:43.200 --> 00:15:44.180
  • look, when the Bible says
  • 00:15:44.180 --> 00:15:45.260
  • that we are fearfully and wonderfully made--
  • 00:15:45.260 --> 00:15:47.160
  • - Do I believe it?
  • 00:15:47.160 --> 00:15:48.110
  • Am I believing it?
  • 00:15:48.110 --> 00:15:49.190
  • - It's not because of what I've done,
  • 00:15:49.190 --> 00:15:50.250
  • it's not because of what I've accomplished,
  • 00:15:50.250 --> 00:15:52.090
  • it's because God literally created me on purpose.
  • 00:15:52.090 --> 00:15:55.210
  • If I didn't have a purpose, I wouldn't be here.
  • 00:15:55.210 --> 00:15:58.010
  • - We're all a product of our past.
  • 00:15:59.040 --> 00:16:01.230
  • I know there's a promise of God, that he says,
  • 00:16:04.150 --> 00:16:07.260
  • "I will take everything that has tried to ruin you,
  • 00:16:07.260 --> 00:16:12.260
  • "that satement for evil,
  • 00:16:13.210 --> 00:16:16.090
  • "and I will make something good out of it."
  • 00:16:16.090 --> 00:16:19.080
  • So, we can come with our messes,
  • 00:16:19.080 --> 00:16:21.230
  • we can come with our trauma,
  • 00:16:21.230 --> 00:16:23.230
  • we can come with our abuse,
  • 00:16:23.230 --> 00:16:25.210
  • we can come with our pain and our hurt,
  • 00:16:25.210 --> 00:16:28.120
  • and God will make and mold that into something good for you.
  • 00:16:28.120 --> 00:16:33.070
  • - How do you begin to move from that,
  • 00:16:34.250 --> 00:16:36.170
  • walking away from that huge meeting
  • 00:16:36.170 --> 00:16:38.170
  • to where you sit today?
  • 00:16:38.170 --> 00:16:40.020
  • - Well, I will tell you, when I left that meeting,
  • 00:16:40.020 --> 00:16:42.100
  • it was a huge wake up moment
  • 00:16:42.100 --> 00:16:43.180
  • because I literally looked around the room
  • 00:16:43.180 --> 00:16:45.050
  • and I saw the most successful people in the world
  • 00:16:45.050 --> 00:16:47.230
  • and I was like, I didn't understand why I was there.
  • 00:16:47.230 --> 00:16:50.090
  • I had to seek God and be like,
  • 00:16:50.090 --> 00:16:52.000
  • "Lord, you caused this to happen.
  • 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:54.250
  • "Why me?"
  • 00:16:54.250 --> 00:16:56.020
  • And I had to begin to reclaim that ground,
  • 00:16:56.020 --> 00:16:58.030
  • the ground that was lost when I was violated,
  • 00:16:58.030 --> 00:17:00.200
  • the ground that was lost when my mother told me
  • 00:17:00.200 --> 00:17:03.220
  • that what happened to me, wouldn't have happened
  • 00:17:03.220 --> 00:17:05.070
  • if I would have closed my legs.
  • 00:17:05.070 --> 00:17:06.130
  • - Oh, my Lord. - I mean, my mother
  • 00:17:06.130 --> 00:17:08.060
  • literally said that to me
  • 00:17:08.060 --> 00:17:09.140
  • and I carried that. - How old were you?
  • 00:17:09.140 --> 00:17:10.120
  • - I was seven.
  • 00:17:10.120 --> 00:17:11.260
  • I mean, it happened between the ages of five and 11,
  • 00:17:11.260 --> 00:17:13.110
  • but I was seven when she told me that.
  • 00:17:13.110 --> 00:17:15.060
  • - That's awful. - And I remembered it
  • 00:17:15.060 --> 00:17:16.040
  • like she said it yesterday.
  • 00:17:16.040 --> 00:17:17.190
  • And I literally had to begin
  • 00:17:17.190 --> 00:17:18.240
  • reclaiming the ground through prayer,
  • 00:17:18.240 --> 00:17:20.180
  • studying the word of God,
  • 00:17:20.180 --> 00:17:22.200
  • and through choosing to believe the truth
  • 00:17:22.200 --> 00:17:25.150
  • that I am who God says I am.
  • 00:17:25.150 --> 00:17:27.160
  • I'm not my past.
  • 00:17:27.160 --> 00:17:28.150
  • I'm not what happened to me.
  • 00:17:28.150 --> 00:17:30.100
  • That's what it took.
  • 00:17:31.120 --> 00:17:32.280
  • It gets back to that point of choosing to believe the truth.
  • 00:17:32.280 --> 00:17:35.190
  • Jesus is the-- - It's almost like
  • 00:17:35.190 --> 00:17:36.280
  • you have to re-wallpaper your mind.
  • 00:17:36.280 --> 00:17:38.020
  • - Yes. - That's a good way to put it.
  • 00:17:38.020 --> 00:17:39.270
  • (talking over each other)
  • 00:17:39.270 --> 00:17:41.200
  • - It's because we identify with labels.
  • 00:17:41.200 --> 00:17:44.020
  • I always say to women that your history
  • 00:17:44.020 --> 00:17:46.200
  • does not determine your destiny.
  • 00:17:46.200 --> 00:17:48.290
  • We wear these labels but that's not who you are.
  • 00:17:48.290 --> 00:17:51.190
  • You are daughter of the king of kings.
  • 00:17:51.190 --> 00:17:54.040
  • - We have identified with a lie about ourselves
  • 00:17:54.040 --> 00:17:57.030
  • and that happened to you
  • 00:17:57.030 --> 00:17:58.140
  • because you're a bad person. - Because of you.
  • 00:17:58.140 --> 00:18:00.170
  • - Or you're damaged goods. - You're less than.
  • 00:18:00.170 --> 00:18:02.000
  • - You're damaged goods. - What can God do with me now?
  • 00:18:02.000 --> 00:18:04.120
  • - You aren't valuable.
  • 00:18:04.120 --> 00:18:05.260
  • - And you should never tell anyone that ever.
  • 00:18:05.260 --> 00:18:07.170
  • You should always hide that. - And that was the generation.
  • 00:18:07.170 --> 00:18:10.140
  • - You'll never been good enough for anybody else.
  • 00:18:10.140 --> 00:18:14.020
  • And we identify and we say yes to that lie
  • 00:18:14.020 --> 00:18:19.020
  • and that's where, I think, we get in trouble
  • 00:18:20.060 --> 00:18:22.020
  • because then we find ourselves.
  • 00:18:22.020 --> 00:18:24.050
  • - We're linking arms with a lie.
  • 00:18:24.050 --> 00:18:26.180
  • Like, we're disengaging from truth
  • 00:18:26.180 --> 00:18:31.040
  • and so we linked with a lie
  • 00:18:31.040 --> 00:18:32.280
  • and we come in agreement with it
  • 00:18:32.280 --> 00:18:34.250
  • and that agreement begins to speak to ourselves,
  • 00:18:34.250 --> 00:18:37.160
  • like our self-narrative
  • 00:18:37.160 --> 00:18:39.150
  • and we accept the fact that the enemy's lie
  • 00:18:39.150 --> 00:18:42.230
  • is you see, you're so unlovable.
  • 00:18:42.230 --> 00:18:45.090
  • - Yep. - You see.
  • 00:18:45.090 --> 00:18:46.170
  • - You see, you're not worth it.
  • 00:18:46.170 --> 00:18:49.100
  • - Who would want you?
  • 00:18:49.100 --> 00:18:50.250
  • And that's the agreement we have to break.
  • 00:18:50.250 --> 00:18:54.020
  • - Sometimes you have to fight for who God says you are.
  • 00:18:54.020 --> 00:18:56.250
  • I remember when I was in a psych hospital
  • 00:18:56.250 --> 00:18:59.010
  • and I would lay in the bed
  • 00:18:59.010 --> 00:19:00.100
  • and I would hear the enemy saying,
  • 00:19:00.100 --> 00:19:01.230
  • "You will never get out of here.
  • 00:19:01.230 --> 00:19:03.120
  • "You're gonna die.
  • 00:19:03.120 --> 00:19:04.120
  • "It's all over,"
  • 00:19:04.120 --> 00:19:05.190
  • And I literally would drag myself out of bed,
  • 00:19:05.190 --> 00:19:08.080
  • stand on my two feet, and I would say,
  • 00:19:08.080 --> 00:19:10.210
  • "I believe I will live to see the goodness of the Lord
  • 00:19:10.210 --> 00:19:13.170
  • "and the land of the living."
  • 00:19:13.170 --> 00:19:15.220
  • And I would declare it, even when I didn't feel it.
  • 00:19:15.220 --> 00:19:18.010
  • Even when I felt like a million miles away from hope,
  • 00:19:18.010 --> 00:19:20.170
  • I would declare this is true, no matter what I'm feeling.
  • 00:19:20.170 --> 00:19:23.200
  • - But, the Book of Revelation
  • 00:19:23.200 --> 00:19:24.250
  • calls Satan the accuser of the brethren.
  • 00:19:24.250 --> 00:19:27.090
  • That's who he is, that's what he does
  • 00:19:27.090 --> 00:19:29.080
  • and I always try to tell people
  • 00:19:29.080 --> 00:19:30.240
  • if you hear something telling you you're unworthy,
  • 00:19:30.240 --> 00:19:33.000
  • that you are unlovable, that you don't matter,
  • 00:19:33.000 --> 00:19:35.210
  • that's not God because if God didn't have a purpose for you,
  • 00:19:35.210 --> 00:19:39.060
  • he would not have created you.
  • 00:19:39.060 --> 00:19:40.240
  • - [Laurie] Don't believe it.
  • 00:19:40.240 --> 00:19:42.080
  • - Before you were formed in your mother's womb, he knew you.
  • 00:19:42.080 --> 00:19:44.210
  • He called you and so, I try to, when I hear those voices,
  • 00:19:44.210 --> 00:19:48.030
  • because we all hear them.
  • 00:19:48.030 --> 00:19:49.090
  • - Yes, daily.
  • 00:19:49.090 --> 00:19:50.210
  • - It's not true. - Look at Instagram,
  • 00:19:50.210 --> 00:19:52.230
  • oh my God.
  • 00:19:52.230 --> 00:19:54.090
  • - Romans 8:1, there is now therefore no condemnation.
  • 00:19:54.090 --> 00:19:56.210
  • Conviction is of the Holy Spirit,
  • 00:19:56.210 --> 00:19:58.270
  • draws you closed to Jesus.
  • 00:19:58.270 --> 00:20:00.040
  • Condemnation is not.
  • 00:20:00.040 --> 00:20:01.180
  • - And condemnation is always laced with the eternal.
  • 00:20:01.180 --> 00:20:04.180
  • That you will forever be unlovable.
  • 00:20:04.180 --> 00:20:07.020
  • You will forever be in shame.
  • 00:20:07.020 --> 00:20:09.020
  • You will forever be denigrated, disregarded,
  • 00:20:09.020 --> 00:20:13.230
  • and I think, you know, when we think of inner healing,
  • 00:20:13.230 --> 00:20:17.070
  • it's like a destination, like, we have arrived.
  • 00:20:17.070 --> 00:20:20.220
  • Like, it happens in a moment, and for some, God bless you,
  • 00:20:20.220 --> 00:20:24.190
  • that you've received that healing in a moment,
  • 00:20:24.190 --> 00:20:26.150
  • but for some of us, we have to work through the process,
  • 00:20:26.150 --> 00:20:30.230
  • but it takes us back to, when we think of healing,
  • 00:20:30.230 --> 00:20:33.270
  • of completeness, of wholeness,
  • 00:20:33.270 --> 00:20:35.250
  • it's taking us back to the Garden.
  • 00:20:35.250 --> 00:20:37.160
  • Where God said, you're a man, you're complete,
  • 00:20:39.180 --> 00:20:42.280
  • you're not lacking anything, go ahead,
  • 00:20:42.280 --> 00:20:45.040
  • take dominion, name the animals, and then he brings Eve.
  • 00:20:45.040 --> 00:20:49.200
  • She's complete, she's blessed, not lacking anything,
  • 00:20:49.200 --> 00:20:53.040
  • but then it's the lie of the enemy,
  • 00:20:53.040 --> 00:20:55.030
  • the snake, the serpent himself,
  • 00:20:55.030 --> 00:20:56.240
  • the one who crawls on his belly is deceiving her,
  • 00:20:56.240 --> 00:21:00.220
  • saying oh, but the lie.
  • 00:21:00.220 --> 00:21:03.070
  • (talking over each other)
  • 00:21:03.070 --> 00:21:05.030
  • - You're not enough.
  • 00:21:05.030 --> 00:21:06.100
  • - That's right, and when the shame came in
  • 00:21:06.100 --> 00:21:08.010
  • is when after both of them took of the fruit,
  • 00:21:08.010 --> 00:21:11.140
  • then they hid themselves with fig leaves.
  • 00:21:11.140 --> 00:21:14.090
  • They tried to cover themselves.
  • 00:21:14.090 --> 00:21:16.180
  • So, that's when shame entered in.
  • 00:21:16.180 --> 00:21:18.150
  • It's the allure of that tree,
  • 00:21:18.150 --> 00:21:21.190
  • the allure that it's better to believe that
  • 00:21:21.190 --> 00:21:24.020
  • than to believe that God said what he said,
  • 00:21:24.020 --> 00:21:27.060
  • which is don't touch that.
  • 00:21:27.060 --> 00:21:28.190
  • - It's the idea that something else can make me whole.
  • 00:21:28.190 --> 00:21:31.230
  • If I just had the next thing,
  • 00:21:31.230 --> 00:21:33.120
  • and what you come to realize,
  • 00:21:33.120 --> 00:21:36.270
  • is there's literally nothing.
  • 00:21:36.270 --> 00:21:38.050
  • I know people who are literally billionaires,
  • 00:21:38.050 --> 00:21:40.250
  • the most successful people on Earth--
  • 00:21:40.250 --> 00:21:42.190
  • - On the outside, look like they have everything.
  • 00:21:42.190 --> 00:21:44.290
  • - Have told me that they would give it all up in a second.
  • 00:21:44.290 --> 00:21:48.070
  • Because they don't feel fulfilled.
  • 00:21:48.070 --> 00:21:49.180
  • Because the more success you achieve,
  • 00:21:49.180 --> 00:21:51.260
  • the more you realize you haven't achieved.
  • 00:21:51.260 --> 00:21:54.030
  • I don't care if you have a million followers,
  • 00:21:54.030 --> 00:21:55.140
  • there's somebody with two.
  • 00:21:55.140 --> 00:21:57.040
  • I don't care if you have 10,
  • 00:21:57.040 --> 00:21:58.040
  • there's somebody with 40 million.
  • 00:21:58.040 --> 00:21:59.190
  • There's always more to achieve,
  • 00:21:59.190 --> 00:22:02.120
  • so you literally have to find your contentment
  • 00:22:02.120 --> 00:22:04.170
  • and the only contentment you can find is in Jesus.
  • 00:22:04.170 --> 00:22:07.090
  • That's that only way because he's your creator.
  • 00:22:07.090 --> 00:22:09.070
  • That's where contentment lies.
  • 00:22:09.070 --> 00:22:11.080
  • - And that's where things like,
  • 00:22:11.080 --> 00:22:12.200
  • Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted,
  • 00:22:12.200 --> 00:22:16.140
  • to set free the captives,
  • 00:22:16.140 --> 00:22:18.230
  • to bind the wounds of the broken,
  • 00:22:18.230 --> 00:22:21.020
  • and this week, we're gonna talk all about it
  • 00:22:21.020 --> 00:22:23.150
  • and it's gonna be such a great week.
  • 00:22:23.150 --> 00:22:26.110
  • - Yay. - We're all gonna get
  • 00:22:26.110 --> 00:22:27.190
  • healed on the inside.
  • 00:22:27.190 --> 00:22:29.020
  • (laughs)
  • 00:22:29.020 --> 00:22:30.000
  • - Absolutely. - Cheers.
  • 00:22:30.000 --> 00:22:31.070
  • (glasses clink)
  • 00:22:31.070 --> 00:22:33.090
  • - So, I don't know what it is you need today.
  • 00:22:33.090 --> 00:22:35.150
  • I think a lot of us need to be healed
  • 00:22:35.150 --> 00:22:37.190
  • in the innermost parts of our heart.
  • 00:22:37.190 --> 00:22:39.170
  • If you need someone to agree with you,
  • 00:22:40.220 --> 00:22:42.170
  • I'm here to do that with you today
  • 00:22:42.170 --> 00:22:45.000
  • and we're gonna ask God, God himself, to walk with us
  • 00:22:45.000 --> 00:22:49.070
  • right into those deep, dark,
  • 00:22:49.070 --> 00:22:52.180
  • traumatizing, most horrible places,
  • 00:22:52.180 --> 00:22:56.060
  • those places that you've never let anybody else allowed in,
  • 00:22:56.060 --> 00:23:01.080
  • or to shine a light on,
  • 00:23:02.000 --> 00:23:04.020
  • we're gonna ask Jesus to come into those places
  • 00:23:04.020 --> 00:23:07.270
  • and to shed his light and to bring his grace
  • 00:23:07.270 --> 00:23:12.000
  • and to receive his redemption
  • 00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:15.000
  • and his salvation to those parts.
  • 00:23:15.000 --> 00:23:17.250
  • God we give over to you everything in our spirits,
  • 00:23:17.250 --> 00:23:22.250
  • everything in our souls, everything in our mind God,
  • 00:23:24.070 --> 00:23:26.060
  • you consume our lives with your presence.
  • 00:23:26.060 --> 00:23:30.250
  • God consume our lives with your life,
  • 00:23:30.250 --> 00:23:33.200
  • and your light and your Holy Spirit.
  • 00:23:33.200 --> 00:23:36.140
  • Come, dwell in those places.
  • 00:23:36.140 --> 00:23:39.190
  • God perform a miracle inside of our hearts.
  • 00:23:39.190 --> 00:23:43.190
  • God let us feel your peace, let us feel your joy,
  • 00:23:43.190 --> 00:23:47.190
  • let us realize that everything that we need,
  • 00:23:47.190 --> 00:23:50.010
  • God, we find in you and you alone.
  • 00:23:50.010 --> 00:23:52.240
  • God and I pray that everybody feels your embrace today.
  • 00:23:52.240 --> 00:23:56.160
  • God and the miracle of salvation, the miracle of healing,
  • 00:23:56.160 --> 00:24:01.180
  • the miracle of peace that passes all understanding,
  • 00:24:03.020 --> 00:24:06.070
  • God I pray that it's ours today
  • 00:24:06.070 --> 00:24:07.220
  • and that we receive you into every area of our life,
  • 00:24:07.220 --> 00:24:11.250
  • every area of our heart, God,
  • 00:24:11.250 --> 00:24:13.280
  • let us receive you, everything that you have for us today,
  • 00:24:13.280 --> 00:24:18.010
  • in Jesus' name.
  • 00:24:18.010 --> 00:24:19.070
  • - [Announcer] You can call the number
  • 00:24:21.020 --> 00:24:22.170
  • on your screen right now to talk to a prayer partner.
  • 00:24:22.170 --> 00:24:24.280
  • We're here for you 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
  • 00:24:24.280 --> 00:24:28.200
  • We love you, but most importantly, Jesus love you.
  • 00:24:28.200 --> 00:24:32.120
  • - Probably my biggest takeaway from today's conversation was
  • 00:24:32.120 --> 00:24:35.190
  • how we all experience trauma and hurt in a different way.
  • 00:24:35.190 --> 00:24:40.060
  • It affects us all differently
  • 00:24:40.060 --> 00:24:42.140
  • and we all heal from it differently.
  • 00:24:42.140 --> 00:24:44.040
  • Sometimes it takes less time, takes more time.
  • 00:24:44.040 --> 00:24:46.170
  • Sometimes, we're still in the midst because it's ongoing.
  • 00:24:46.170 --> 00:24:51.170
  • So, I just think it's beautiful
  • 00:24:52.130 --> 00:24:54.220
  • to see how these incredibly beautiful, strong women
  • 00:24:54.220 --> 00:24:59.050
  • have every reason to not be strong
  • 00:24:59.050 --> 00:25:02.140
  • but to be broken because of what they've experienced.
  • 00:25:02.140 --> 00:25:07.070
  • They are not and if that doesn't give you hope
  • 00:25:07.070 --> 00:25:12.070
  • and give you courage, I just don't know what will.
  • 00:25:13.200 --> 00:25:16.260
  • God has a plan and he has purpose for all of our lives.
  • 00:25:16.260 --> 00:25:19.190
  • - [Announcer] You can watch full episodes
  • 00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:22.000
  • of Better Together online.
  • 00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:23.220
  • Go to BetterTogether.tv to catch up
  • 00:25:23.220 --> 00:25:25.290
  • on all of the latest conversations.
  • 00:25:25.290 --> 00:25:27.270
  • Here's what's coming up next on Better Together.
  • 00:25:30.020 --> 00:25:32.270
  • - Had been admitted to a psychiatric hospital
  • 00:25:32.270 --> 00:25:36.020
  • because I kind of fell apart.
  • 00:25:36.020 --> 00:25:37.160
  • I mean, I just had a break down
  • 00:25:37.160 --> 00:25:39.040
  • where I couldn't breathe,
  • 00:25:39.040 --> 00:25:40.130
  • I couldn't walk, I couldn't survive.
  • 00:25:40.130 --> 00:25:42.280
  • - [Announcer] Watch Better Together weekdays
  • 00:25:42.280 --> 00:25:44.200
  • and Tuesday nights, only on TBN.
  • 00:25:44.200 --> 00:25:47.190